fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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