:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
honey bunches of taint.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
