Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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