So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Randomize
