Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
