Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
