ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
