I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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