I'm lost and stupid without you.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize