i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.