Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize