Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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