I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
