Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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