Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Randomize