We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
