Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i will never coherently bang her
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
