So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
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i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
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i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize