what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
