I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
