im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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