No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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