You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
FUCK WHALES
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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