I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize