god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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