i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize