I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
