Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
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they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
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I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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