she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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