It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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