sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We have started to decorate penises.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
