don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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