All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize