Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
