Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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