Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
