I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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