C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize