I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
