Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
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It's official drugs can't kill me
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Enjoy the penises
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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