The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Randomize
