VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
