Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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