Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here