I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
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i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
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We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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