You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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