You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
