I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.