Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.