Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
