I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
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I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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